Sunday, November 20, 2011

A new idea.. a stage show


I know, I know it's been over a year since I have written. I have kept up the hooking and achieved my financial goals (almost). I have kept taking records and statistics for every job.

I'm going to get out of the game soon, there are other things I want to do. But I have this need to express, I want to tell my story and I want to tell it on my own terms. So I'm writing a one hour stage play, filled with anecdotes of my experiences as a working girl, the misconceptions I want to challenge the myths (like that most men who go to prostitutes only want to talk and cuddle) and of course show the statistics, the raw data of one woman's experience.

The final punctuation mark should be an exclamation mark, it only seems fitting.

So over the next little while the look and feel of this blog will change to match the posters and website of the show. I will change my photo for one of Rachel Rouge, a good friend and local burlesque performer who will play me in the show.

I'll post details as they come to hand at (I have my fingers crossed that this link works, at the time of publishing I was still working on the domain name transfer).

The show will be part of the New Zealand Fringe festival and will be at the Fringe Bar for 4 nights at 8.30pm from the 22nd to the 25th of February, Tickets will be on sale from the 20th of December (check the website if you are interested) I also have an opportunity to take it to New York City in March which is scary and exciting.

So this is a final goodbye to the blog and hello to a new world of expression and the indulgence of my ego.

Length of time I've been a working girl: 2 years
Total shifts worked: 85
Total jobs done: 286
Total unique clients: 166

Friday, September 3, 2010

Can’t get laid in a brothel

I'm finding this place rather humbling. In New Zealand I found that I shone out as a more refined, elegant and eloquent lady in my mid-range brothel, here I’m struggling to gain a foothold against beautiful women who are more charming, groomed, and experienced than me. I have to up my game, but how? How does one become better at selling sex with oneself specifically? Sex sells, we know that, but with when sex is on offer from a luscious bevy of ladies how do I sell myself?

The girls are all very nice, they are really helpful and pass on tips and information about the clients freely. But holy fuck they are a league above.

There is a stunning brunette, she’s 40 but hardly looks like she has dipped into her 30s, she has a natural pose, grace and elegance, she’s used sex work to fund qualifications in practical physics. She is one of those people who I wish would write an autobiography, it would be incredibly readable.

There is an angelic lass from Perth who has come over for a couple of weeks. It’s a 3.5 hour flight for me to come from NZ, for her is was over 4 hours. She’s a hard worker, she stays all night and takes 4 hour sleep breaks then gets back to work. She comes all the way to the East Coast to earn some money and keep it separate from her clean life as a mum of 4 kids, business owner and loving wife. Two things stand out about her, one she has 4 kids to her husband and has the body of a gymnast with stunning features, and two, she talks to her husband after each shift and tells him how it went. Amazing.

There’s a 19 year old Pacific Islander, who has a face of her age but a voice and manner of an educated woman years above.

And a sweet wife who’s husband thinks she’s working at a rub-and-tug place, but misses brothel work.

There is another kiwi lass who with a wig glides across the floor like a high class prostitute or a bond girl, but at the end of the shift when she removes the wig and make up is a fresh faced, sporty girl next door.

And two utterly lovely lasses, a blonde and a brunette, so friendly and sweet, this blows me away. They know I'm only about for a week. They get tons of girls who just come through for a short time to make a few bucks, they don't need to be nice or put the effort in to get to know me.

These are genuinely lovely women, and I think that is what makes them genuinely great prostitutes. Rocking the fake tans, acrylic nails, implants, peroxide, false lashes and hair extensions are some of the most articulate, socially aware, thoughtful, interesting people I have met. This is what makes this brothel 5 stars, this babes are fucken top quality.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Holy shit this place is fancy!

After a manicure, full wax and a flight, I have arrived in Sydney, and found my way to the brothel. It's 5 stars! Friendly greeting and a quick tour, I choose my shifts for the upcoming week, lament the lack of wireless and retire to my room... it’s one of the brothel’s bedrooms. Business has been really slow so they can afford to use the space for accommodation purposes. The brothel - like the NZ one that I work in - is 24 hours, however, instead of splitting the time into two shifts 13 hours over night and 11 hours during the day all the shifts are 8 hours and overlap providing a continuous flow of ladies.

Each room has a minibar, large flat-screen TV, bed made up with an abundance of cushions, Indian cotton sheets, complementary soaps, mouthwash, shoe horn, shampoos and conditioners all packaged in tiny stylish containers. Honestly beautiful. The girls have a lovely mirrored changing room down stairs, and food is provided. No really, all food is provided.

In my NZ brothel a girl answers the door, the client is brought into a lounge of women like a lamb to the slaughter. Girls can engage in conversation or ignore the client, there is a kind of mutual respect among the girls that prevents interrupting or pushiness. Here the client is greeted by the receptionist who leads him in, offers a complementary drink and the girls introduce themselves one at a time.

The introductions are key, some girls come straight in with the sex talk asking if they are looking for anything special, others take a more friendly approach. I have been trying both, finding my footing. If there are a lot of girls on the introductions need to be kept short about 2 minutes. On a couple of occasions while introducing myself - trying to be friendly, fun, sexy, warm, genuine and charming in under 2 minutes - another girl has come up and stood a metre away. A beautiful blonde lean 22 year old. It’s really hard to keep a guys attention under those conditions.

I'm here for a week, I'll keep you posted.

Monday, August 30, 2010


Occasionally clients can’t draw the line between fantasy and delusion. Recently I had this one job client who first proudly told me how he had ‘saved’ a girl from prostitution. What arrogance! Why support an industry you think someone needs to be saved from? Everything you give money to you support. dick.

Then he asked me where I worked (I’m happy to tell clients I have a day job, I even go so far to say it’s in the city or that I do office work). I coyly told him that a girl’s got to have some mystery. he asked me if I have a boyfriend, I said whether I do or not has nothing to do with our time together. Next he asked if he could have my phone number (I guess he thought his line of questioning was charming) by not my response had left coy and turned to cool: “no”.
Then he asked “maybe you could not use a condom.”
“Do you understand where you are?”
“Have you been her before?”
“So you understand the agreement we have here, there are certain things that are not negotiable.”
“but I just thought...”
“No exceptions.”
He lost his erection, I only felt bad for a second, he continued to sulk quietly. i got to work in peace and he eventually left a happy customer.

Still a dick though.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Taking it further

I've now become comfortable in my secret life as a part time hooker. I thought I'd take it a step further, so I bought a strap on.

Now what? I can take it into work in the hope that a change request will come up. So far only one client has indicated an interest that would warrant a device like this. I really wouldn't want to bring it up in conversation, I don't want to scare them away.

I'm thinking of creating a menu of extras that can casually sit on the bedside table, just so clients know that there are other options beyond vanilla sex and they come with an extra price. I've just got to find the delicate wording that would be both clear and tactful for such a menu. Also, what are the going rates? I'm just going to make it up based on a regular hourly rate of $200 and what I would be happy with. Here is what I have so far.

Happily provided free of charge:
Body slide with oil
Giving you a hand job
Giving you a blow job
Cuddles and spooning
Tell you a story
Listen to your story

I would be happy to provide the following services for you:
Giving anal play - $30
Rimming you - $40
Using a dildo on you - $40
Cock ring - $30
Strap-on - $50
Giving you a toe-job/foot massage - $30
Restraining you lightly (silk scarves) - $50
Blindfolding you - $30

I would be happy to receive the following from you:
Come on my back or belly - $50
Receiving toe-job/foot massage - $20
Receiving oral sex - $30
Receiving hand job - $40

I dress in stockings and suspenders - $20
I dress you in stockings and suspenders - $60
Please let me know your desires, I'm open to suggestion

I don't know. I'm still thinking it through, I really want to be clear about the differences between giving and receiving. Giving a fantastically good foot massage takes a lot more work than receiving one. Giving a hand job is a lot easier for me than enduring a rough, dry and overly enthusiastic hand job from a client that can leave me raw and make the rest of the day difficult. And I have no problems with anal sex as long as I'm the one doing the penetrating.

Also, I have decided to take a working holiday for a week to Australia. I'm planning to go in, work hard for about 6 days, have a couple of days for shopping and sight seeing, make a lot of money and head back here.

Australian prostitution laws are similar to New Zealand ones. I have already done a bit of internet research, found a nice place that charges AU$300 per hour (that's NZD$380). I emailed them with photos and a link to that adult forum review and lined up some work. I'm rather proud of myself. It might be a good place to try out my menu. I hear that they charge extra for everything over there, including blow jobs, body slides and hand jobs.

Note to self, must buy a cock ring and find out what exactly I'm supposed to do with it.

Length of time I've been a working girl: 9 months
Total shifts worked: 30
Total jobs done: 92
Total unique clients: 64

Saturday, July 24, 2010

An average job: In the bedroom

I had a great day yesterday, 4 bookings, three of which were regulars, and one was a new client who wanted to do some fantasy role play, I charged him an additional $80 for it. I made $600 which I think is my best day so far. I'm really getting the hang of this. Let me tell you about how a normal job is with a new client.

After the client has made the booking (see below for how we get to this point) I lead him up the stairs. I find it important to take control and establish the lead right from the start.

After we enter my room I make my first physical gesture: sometimes a light stroke to the shoulder, a touch on the cheek, sometimes a kiss. I make eye contact and offer a compliment: "mmm you smell nice", "you look like you are going to be a lot of fun", "what lovely eyes you have". I know it sound cheesy, but I want them to know that I'm happy to have them in the room and that I'm looking forward to sharing time with them.

We'll say this is an hour job, which is pretty standard. If they have visited prostitutes before they will normally start undressing. It's standard practice to have have shower first and most guys know this. A few will ask not too "I've just had a shower, I don't need another" or worse "It's ok, I'll have a shower after". There is only a couple of clients that I have let get away without showering, both regulars, one because he has difficulty walking and standing without support and the other one because I like his smell. I almost always use the line "how about I warm the shower up for you" I got that line from the lovely Dorian.

While he is in the shower I remove the cover from the bed, place the two very thin pillows on top of each other at the head of the bed and lay down a towel. Most importantly I remove my dress and with my back to the shower squirt a small dob of lubrication onto two fingers and slip it into my vagina. Logically I'd leave my dress on for as long as possible to use up more time, but it's too much of a challenge slipping in the lube without getting it on my dress. I then pose seductivly in my underwear on the bed while I wait for him to finish showering.

As soon as the shower is turned off I greet him with a fresh towel and as he steps out I offer to dry his back. It's all about timing and pacing, I dry his back, then up and down the backs of his legs by standing beside him and bending over. I sometimes talk, sometimes listen, but mostly stroke his skin and lead him over to the bed. This generally takes us to 10 past the hour.

I like to offer a massage with oil. I find this a great way to stretch out the time and make him super comfortable. I start with the back, I'm not a trained masseuse so I avoid pressure on the spine and simply try to do whatever I think feels nice. After the back, I get him to roll over. I use tons of baby oil and massage chest, arms and legs. It's important at this point to get loads of oil over the legs in order to master an excellent body slide. I remove my bra, pour oil over my chest and with is help smear it around. With both of us covered in oil several minutes can be used sliding up and down his body with mine. This works a hell of a lot better on a man with less hair.

Bu now we have got to about 25 past the hour. I use a tissue or towel to wipe oil away from his cock (it can effect the performance of the condom). Sometimes I give a handjob with lube, but mostly I put on a condom with my mouth. I generally always start this way with the client lying down on his back - he gets a nice relaxing experience where he is pleasured without having to put to much effort in or make any decisions.

Everyone is different, sometimes there are a lot of positions, I find doggy style good if I want a guy to come quickly. Sometimes guys prefer a handjob or a blowjob, sometimes they want to pleasure me, other times they are all about the kissing and cuddling.

After he comes I remove the condom, use a moist wipe or towel to wipe away any fluids. I think a lot of working girls see this as the moment that their job is done, but I like to give a good service until the end of the session. I will stroke their hair and tell them how much I enjoy being with them. I leave 10 minutes for him to shower again and dress, I often jump in the shower with him, scrub his back and shower myself. I leave the shower first so he has a bit of time to rinse off and I can dry off and dress. If I don't shower with him I wear a towel and shower after he leaves.

I always walk him to the bedroom door and give him a peck or a hug before he leaves, I tell him that I hope to see him again soon.

It's pretty simple, and it's a lot about pacing, I want to give the client the maximum amount of pleasure but I also don't want to spend 30 minutes out of every hour hard-out fucking. The guys who book longer are usually after the girlfriend experience, so a 3 hour job is less exhausting than three 40 minute jobs.

Saturday, July 17, 2010


I had a performance review for my day job a few days ago, it went well my boss is happy with my work and I got a nice pay rise. But he mentioned something that got thinking a wee bit too much. He asked me if it was about time that I should think about a career instead of just a job. He's right, I'm in my 30s (my hooker age is 26, I think a good way to get a hooker age is half your age plus 9) and have never had a career.

I like to travel, so generally I grab a job, stick with it for a couple of years and save enough to travel. But now I'm starting to think about what happens next. Something I have never considered before. If it is just a job then I might as well work only 4 days a week at the office and 2 days a week at the brothel where I earn more money, have a more relaxing day and I'm a whole lot more interested in the industry.

I really like my job, and there appears to be a lot of room to move up from being an office lady, but it is not in a field that I'm interested in. I'm going to talk to a friend in London tonight, I would have chatted with him earlier but finding a reasonable time for a call between NZ and UK during the week is difficult.

Boring post, I know, at least it's short. I'll blog more about prostitution soon.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Getting a booking

One of the reasons I started this blog was because I was curious as to what actually happens in a brothel. I know what generally happens, but I was looking for details. I think I have been working long enough now to give you a general idea of a pretty average booking.

The brothel where I work is a two story building, discreetly located and with ample parking. The open plan ground floor mostly consists of a reception area, a lounge, and smoking area. The rooms are upstairs, and each girl has her own room for the entire shift.

I arrive early in the morning, I'm normally first, occasionally I meet the night girls packing up and heading home. I normally take the same room and the cleaners now know to clean my room first. I unpack my bag: liquid soap and loofa inside the shower (the soap provided is not very nice and the dispenser sometimes doesn't work), a bottle of listerine and a hair-tie outside the shower.

The bedside table has a lamp and a box of tissues provided. I place a nice display of three regular condoms, three large and three small on the table with a bottle of baby oil and a container of lubricant. In the drawer I unpack more condoms, clean underwear, moist towels and my make-up. My coat, comfortable shoes and bag is pushed under the bed.

I carry a handbag that I only use in the brothel, it contains whatever book I'm reading, notebook, pen, super-stay lipstick, mirror, a purse with condoms and lube for outcalls, menstrual sponges and tampons (just in case), deodorant, nail file, nail polish, wallet and phone. Everything I need for the day and no extra clutter.

We wait in the lounge, reading our books until the doorbell rings. Some girls chat, some girls smoke, some girls nap, we make cups of tea, and chill. We answer the door ourselves. I always have the shot of fear that on the other side of the door it might be someone I know. It hasn't happened yet, but New Zealand is a very small country. A new guy often chooses to book the girl who greeted him at the door, so it's always a good idea. The men often walk past straight to the reception desk ignoring you. I totter along behind spewing out pleasantries, and offering a hot drink or a glass of water.

The time wasters, or tire-kickers will dome straight in, get themselves a drink and sit themselves down, from the moment the doorbell rings all books are away, all shoes are on and all girls are looking as available (but not necessarily as amicable) as possible.

We get chatting, sometimes it's hard work, sometimes the conversation just flows. Many men will make a decision early and book straight away (this is all done at the reception desk with the shift manager), others need to be convinced. To be honest none of us really do much convincing, we are all nice and friendly but open flirting and overt conversation is not often done, maybe because we try to maintain a level of etiquette downstairs, or more likely because we all know it's a brothel and we can't be bothered giving it the hard sell.

Sometimes men will push it "so what do you do?", "are you a nympho?", "What are you into?" this could be because they are looking for something in particular, or it could be because they are looking for some free dirty talk for the wank-bank. I find it's best to answer with something like "my specialities are diverse" (I know that's an oxymoron I could guarantee you that the client would miss it) "is there something in particular that you are looking for?".

When a client books either they go to the shift manager who then calls the chosen girl over, or they ask the girl directly who will then lead them to the shift manager to take the booking. The shift manager is always very clear about the amount of time paid for "Lucy, could you please look after John for one hour." that way there is no misunderstanding about booking times. In order for him to relax and so he relates to me on a human level I continue my pleasantries all they way to the door. I want to ensure that I give the impression that I am providing a service, and I'm not a product for hire.

So that takes us from the door of the brothel to the door of the room. I'll tell you the rest in another post.

x Lucy

Sunday, July 11, 2010

It's the lies that hurt

I find the lying difficult. Only to the people I care about. 5 days a week I head off to work at my lovely day job and come home to my flat that I share with 5 others. We all ask each other 'how's your day'. On the 6th day of the week they kinda know I'm not at work, but I always disappear before 9am and return sometime after 7pm. I think my flatmates might assume I go to my office job on Saturdays. Occasionally they ask where I'm going or where I've been, I always say to a friend's house, I use the name of The Manager, it make me feel like it is less of a lie.

This I'm ok with, I like my flatmates but I'm not close to them.

I do have other friends who I want to tell, I know they will be cool with it, but I just don't have any reason to tell them and I'd prefer to keep my prostitution information limited to a need-to-know list. This knowledge that I'm keeping secrets from people I like doesn't sit well with me, and has, over the past year, resulted in a resurgence of an annoying social anxiety disorder: blushing.

I know blushing is normal and no big deal, but it can really hinder my ability to be myself. I tend to be an open and honest person, and fearing that I might be found out, knowing that I'm lying by omission increases the frequency, depth and sensation of my blushes. I used to have a huge blushing problem a few years ago, I when to a hypnotherapist (that made it much worse), a clinical phycologist (who was patronising and condescending) and finally a acupuncturist that reduced the blushing and my general anxiety levels.

So I've gone back to an acupuncturist, I find the sessions painful and the anxiety of seeing the acupuncturist actually now outweighs the anxiety from blushing (or anticipating blushes that inevitably result in blushing). But it's not as bad as it could be, if I think it is getting out of hand I might just tell my friend what I do. But for now I'll keep my secrets to myself and deal with the sensation of heat and redness with as much grace and dignity as I can muster.

Fortunately I don't blush in the brothel, guess I'm just comfortable there, nothing to hide.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Getting better

I've had some interesting clients, and I'm getting regulars. Overall business dropped off rapidly for a while but is slowly coming back. When I started 4 jobs was average, now the days are only one of two jobs with a lot of waiting around in between. There's several contributing factors, I'm no longer new, so business from brothel regulars will drop off for me unless I can get my own personal regulars. The brothel's website has been down for over 2 months, I think in the sex industry if you don't have an online presence you are totally invisible to potential new clients, and it looks like my brothel has no intention of getting the site up again. Finally, business is slow all over, the agency Dorian works for normally has 6 clients per day, some days now it only gets one. I guess as an economic indicator the sex industry lags rather than leads.

I've started to get some really fabulous regulars. There is a beautiful gentleman who sees me monthly, the first time he brought chocolates, as he has got to know me he has begun bringing me books - non-fiction, Christopher Hitchens and the like. It's really sweet and he totally spoils me. Another weekly regular that I look forward to seeing is a young man who enjoys a really intimate hour and a half of holding and kissing. he is one of those clients I always want to ask what brings them to a brothel. And then there is one other who also likes the 'girlfriend experience' who has become a regular, he is overweight, it has opened my eyes up to overweight people, there is something actually quite nice about being with a larger man, they are warmer, more huggable and soft in a very comforting way.

I hope I don't become complacent or bored, I want to be able to maintain the same standard of service over a long period of time. Satisfying my clients tends to give me a great deal of satisfaction myself.

There is a regular in the brothel who I have had a job with once... actually there a several regulars who come to the brothel who I have had a job with once. We call them tire-kickers or time-wasters. But this particular one is a bit draining, he haggles, and haggles, asking if he can come twice, or more, asking if he has to take a shower, asking if I can extend the time, asking if we can do a deal. He's asian which doesn't help with racial stereotyping. I'm going to give myself a rule that if I can't get him to make a booking in 10 minutes I'm going to walk away. He's just not worth it. It's a brothel, not a bar or a drop in centre.

I've had a bit of an emotional week, I broke it off with the boy. He is really lovely and I absolutely fancy the pants off him, but he wasn't treating me very well, he hasn't been telling whole truths and also making commitments (like spending more time with me, doing more stuff together etc) that he just can't honour. I know that he likes me too, and that he does want to be able to be with me but he just doesn't have the time for me, and as much as it hurts me to break it I kind of have to. I can't accept being treated badly even if it means the alternative is the horrible empty loneliness of having something lovely for a very brief period of time and then losing it.

Wow, bit of a rant there, I'm still a bit fragile and tender.

But in other news (good news too) I have managed to get a spot for a week in an amazing brothel in Sydney. So I'm popping over to Australia for a weeks working holiday. If this works out I'll take more trips over. The prostitution laws in Australia are similar to New Zealand. I'm looking forward to it.

Also I brought a strap-on and have started writing a menu of extras that I thought I might like to offer. I'll let you know once I have it worked out.

Shifts worked: 25
Total jobs: 76
Unique clients: 59